Bad beat: ‘Mile-high’ defence crashes, and a roller-skating thief eludes capture

A passenger has a drink before boarding a plane. Stock photo by Getty Images

An aborted airborne escapade results in a conviction and a strangely-dressed robber evading Calgary cops are among the stories in our Friday felony roundup.

Airborne sex excuse doesn’t fly

A Halifax judge didn’t buy the limp defence of a woman who tried joining the “mile-high club” on an Air Canada flight last year and convicted her on four charges.

Alicia Lander and a “friend” were caught engaging in inappropriate in-flight entertainment in January 2014 and were arrested shortly after landing. Lander also cussed out an arresting officer and kicked a hole in the interrogation room wall.

For all that, she was found guilty of committing an indecent act in public, causing a disturbance, assaulting a police officer, and mischief to property.

Lander told the judge she had “no memory of the plane, really at all,” but was informed that not remembering isn’t a defence. She reportedly downed 14 whiskeys while in transit (not all in flight), which likely contributed to her amnesia.

She’s due back in court in July for sentencing. Her companion, Jason George Chase, pleaded guilty to his charges.

Calgary cops seek sporty Jason Voorhees

If you’re going to rob a store, it makes sense to wear a mask. But that doesn’t mean you compensate by wearing an otherwise very conspicuous outfit.

Somehow, Calgary police haven’t found a hatchet-wielding weirdo who who robbed a convenience store while wearing a ski mask, jumpsuit and “1970’s-style roller skates.”

Earlier this week, he robbed a 7-Eleven and escaped with undisclosed items, presumably whatever you can carry on roller skates when you already have a hatchet. Nobody was injured and police are asking for public help.

It’s a white male, age 25-35 who owns a red track suit and old-timey roller skates. How many of those do you know?

Housing gambit gone wrong

A Winnipeg man pleaded guilty to assaulting his girlfriend and got a lighter sentence after a court learned he did it at her request.

A Garden Hill First Nation woman asked Brent Beardy to beat her because she believed that a domestic violence allegation would help her land a spot in provincial housing.

Beardy initially faced the more serious charge of aggravated assault, but the victim eventually admitted that she coaxed him into a fight.

Beardy pleaded guilty to assault causing bodily harm and was sentenced to time served plus probation. There’s no word on whether the victim will face further consequences.

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